The next trend in music — and we need it

I am always listening for new music and fell HARD for Mitchell Tenpenny’s “Bucket List.” It got me to thinkin’. (When you listen to country music, you don’t think, you “get to thinkin’” or I didn’t work in country music for a spell).

[embed]Mitchell Tenpenny’s “Bucket List” is my pick for the ultimate song for coming out of a pandemic.

PREDICTION:

We are about to hear a constant stream of HAPPY, uptempo music like this. The reason behind it has nothing to do with the fact that summer song 2021 contenders are about to battle for listener bandwidth. I could be wrong; the industry has changed and songs are breaking on Tik Tok now — not charts.

Let me explain why I think I’m right:

The oldest hit music theory in the book is that downtempo music climbs the charts during an economic upturn while we get the uptempo happy stuff like Tenpenny during an economic downturn. The 90s were a great economic time — and we worshipped Curt Cobain. Heading into the 00s, we were blasting Britney Spears and boy bands.

If my new read from James Rickards is to be believed, we are headed into a Great Depression post-COVID. So it’s easy to predict that the happiest songs of our lives are about to come out.

Charts used to mean something to the music-consuming public — and to a music nerd like me. But I also used to torrent off Napster and use dirty headphones at the listening stations of Tower Records, too. The music industry has splintered into so many different directions, I’d have to spend a day aggregating data — which everyone extrapolates anyway. (I’m about to extrapolate some myself if you keep reading).

Charts aside, historical culture trends like this just may stay.

The harder times get, the more we need music. With the world set to reopen now (my own county just lifted all restrictions) we need music to match what’s about to be the biggest party atmosphere of all time. We need the soundtrack to the times ahead — which will, no doubt, feel like an endless spring break to make up for the lost time of 2020.

Here’s my handy guide to releasing post-pandemic music:

If your album doesn’t come with a red solo cup and BBQ tongs, don’t bother putting it out.

If your song can’t be played at the club at approximately 1:12 a.m. to light it up, don’t bother putting it out.

If your stuff isn’t road trip-worthy, keep a lid on it.

If someone’s Great Aunt Cindy won’t shake her skinny jeans to your track and claim she learned its dance on Tik Tok, for the love of God, don’t release it.

The post-pandemic 20s will roar, New Great Depression or not.

Whether we have jobs or not, whether COVID left us disabled or not — we all want to get to the party and make some memories. I lost a couple friends to COVID — one while I circled the drain myself. As I laid in bed wondering if my time had come, I thought about two things I wanted to do if I survived (and clearly I have). I want to go to concerts and yoga classes again. That’s it. Two simple things. No more Zoom yoga, no more sappy “we are in it together” shows on Facebook.

The current Billboard Hot 100 chart shows only one true uptempo track in the top 10 and that’s “Up” by Cardi B. The top ten is still pretty downtempo. Lots of Drake…

Of all the songs shooting up the chart (either with a debut or clear jump up) outside the top ten, only seven are uptempo enough to qualify for the trend I predict is coming:

26 — “Hold On” by Justin Bieber

30 — “What’s Your Country Song” by Thomas Rhett

31 — “Just The Way” by Parmalee & Blanco Brown

37 — “Astronaut on the Ocean” by Masked Wolf (highly recommend)

71 — “Somebody Like That” by Tenille Arts

77 — “The Business” Tiesto

78 — “Almost Maybes” by Jordan Davis

No matter how bad the pandemic got for us — and I assure you mine got ugly — we all want to shake it off and honor our dead by LIVING OUT LOUD. We’ll be checking off our bucket lists and we need the right soundtrack.

Want more? Read *The Most Subtle Takeaway From The Billie Eilish Documentary You May Have Missed*, also by Heather Larson.