Chasing the Little White Ball

Sunday April 12 2026, Rusty

Screenshot from my private golf lesson

Henry is an only child by my choice. It was not my intention that he ended up spending a lot of time with the TV and later video games, but hindsight is 20/20. He loves sports of all kinds, playing, or watching. When he was around ten he got into watching golf on TV, and of course wanted to try hitting some balls. Bill played golf before I met him, and it was easy for him to take Henry to the golf course and play a few rounds. Since they were a two-some, the courses would assign them to play with other singles or another two-some. They didn’t like that. Before I knew what was happening, they talked me into giving golf a try, got my own set of clubs, split a private lesson with Henry, and off to the course I went.

We started in the small nine-hole course in Pruneridge in the corner of Saratoga Ave and San Tomas Expressway. We played a few nice courses that summer, including on vacation in central coast. We stopped in Alameda and played at Corica (most likely), and all I could remember was how cold and breezy Alameda was in the summer. On the day after Thanksgiving we were on the golf course when Tiger Woods had his first famous car crash and his then wife broke his car windows, with his irons? In the winter we played in Boulder Creek in a huge rainstorm and Henry was so happy to finally get to the pizza joint to fill up and dry out.

Then Henry went on to enjoy other sports and I didn’t play golf again until summer 2020. It was the height of the lockdown and I was spending most of weekend hours with Bart. Everything we enjoyed doing were closed, restaurants, music venues, museums, and travel was still limited to absolute necessity. One day we figured out we could play golf. It’s outdoors, naturally distanced, good exercise, and fits his engineer mind. We played almost every weekend that summer, which triggered his need to renegotiate his kids schedule with his ex (never a good conversation starter). We had one of our first major fights because of golf. We had our ultimate big relationship-ending fight on the golf course. Surprisingly, I continued to play, especially when he was busy so I could play alone. Is that rubbing salt in the wound? Maybe.

I had multiple friends asking me, “Do you actually like playing golf?” What they didn’t ask was, “Do you play because you have to keep a man company?” No, I actually really enjoy playing, and I would have never predicted that myself.

Golf is good physical exercise. I always walk the course, so on an 18-hole course I usually walk more than six miles. Add to that pushing a fully loaded cart, hitting a ball more times than I want to admit, and being out in hot or cold weather. I’m always exhausted after a round, and I call that “the good tired”.

Golf gives me mental focus. I don’t socialize much when I play, and if the course and people in my group allow me I prefer playing alone. I like the precision, even though I don’t keep scores. I play at my pace, focusing on each stroke. It’s my game, just me and the little ball.

Golf takes me to beautiful places. There are golf courses in some of the most scenic places and I can use playing golf as an excuse to visit all these places. I can do that cheaply, playing in public courses with my San Francisco resident’s card, or as lavishly as I can afford.