Victim Triangle Conditioning within the Pyramid of Persecution

Victim Triangle Conditioning within the Pyramid of Persecution

by Alyce Dylan

Truly understanding the Victim Triangle dynamic within the Persecutor Pyramid will be one of those moments in life to which there was a ‘before’ and then an ‘after’. It is a clarity on the state of modern human behaviour that once seen, will illuminate shadows you will remember having boxed in confusion before but once recognised, will unfold themselves before you like a spotlit red carpet.

There just is no going back.

With that in mind, if you’re ready, let’s dive in.

Beginning with the Victim Triangle the baseline understanding here comes from common sense. This instinctive reactionary paradigm is written into our DNA and activates without contemplation, thought or hesitation. Picture the scene — you’re out for a walk to the neighbouring village across the veld in Africa. Off to the left between the gently swaying grasses, the head of a lion comes into view. She looks hungry. She’s definitely seen you. Off to the right is a small herd of zebra with a zebra foal frolicking about.

Directly ahead, a tree.

There will be no thinking involved. You will run for the tree (your potential rescuer) to escape the lion (the persecutor of the moment), leaving the zebra herd to fend for themselves (your potential fellow-victims). I hear some of you wail — you think you might try to save the zebra foal or scare off the lion — but they don’t hunt alone and against the great big carnivorous putty-tat and her kin, trust me — your conscience wont kick in until you are high in the branches.

This is survival instinct and short of the presence of expert skill or weapons, this is the dynamic that would play out and this same instinct has ensured the survival of the human race through time.

Organically however, this instinct is perfectly at home in the scenario applied above — evoked by life or death fear and rooted in survival. Prior to the last few centuries, that is where this instinct and the Victim/Persecutor/Rescuer paradigm would have remained. Life or death.

And then something went very wrong.

For while it seems like people ‘of old’ must have lived with fear, poverty, disease and mayhem, in truth while life in many respects was limited, a person could live a whole human experience without much experience of true life and death fear — with the exception of times of famine, war or dire poverty. Firstly, there were simply less people, smaller communities, larger families and support systems that have all but faded from the modern experience. Life would have been ‘hard’ by modern standards for sure, but not flooded with fear — certainly not to the extent that it is today or to the amplitude most people experience simply between waking and getting to work.

What changed? The breakdown of community for one as more people meant fewer interactions with the same people. The family fragmentation. Information exposure. Media and propaganda and from certain analysis, a greater effort to keep the people of the planet fearful as panicked masses are far easier to manipulate and control. You could even assign some of it to nutrient deficiencies like a generic magnesium deficiency which does affect much of the global population. Take your pick, whatever the cause the fear quotient exploded and has been increasing in amplitude each decade.

At some point along the rising curve of this trajectory, the fear-levels in society crept high enough for the Victim Triangle instict response to take on a whole new application. Even with no lion on the horizon, fear rose to a point of survival life and death level fear quotient and the human survival instinct pulls the paradigm of the Victim/Persecutor/Rescuer out of the dna data-base far outside of its appropriate applications.

But this instinct was only meant for life-saving application. It serves us very well in a very short period, but becomes deeply destructive over extended periods.

Just the health implications can be deadly — rising blood-pressure, fight or flight response kept running long after the danger has passed leading to adrenal overload.

Across society, an epidemic of people getting stuck inside this paradigm as it is activated for longer and longer periods became noticeable. Perhaps one of the clearest examples is in young women in third world countries that are raised within this mindset today. With few exceptions, young women learn — if not directly from their own mothers then from society and from their own mothers behaviour that the world is broken down into three kinds of people: Victims (us), Persecutors (from government to ‘them’) and potential Rescuers. They learn the vital skill of making themselves attractive to or manipulating the ‘rescuers’ to perform the needed ‘Rescue’.

This is by no means the only expression of this instinct stuck ON and turned UP but an easy one to see through society — even in more stable societies.

So children who were once nurtured into some sense of security (if limited and boring by our standards) are now often receiving the programming from their own fearful parents that the world is broken into these three categories of people as they are stuck in not only actual physical survival undertainty but also a pervasive surivor mentality. When a young child exposed to this long-playing record (intended by nature as a jingle) then meets a moment where they become convinced that their OWN needs will not be met and they will need to ensure they can take care of themselves, the young narcissist is born. We all have the capacity for narcissistic behaviour when under some kind of threat (so we operate for a time from this Victim Triangle Paradigm) but many of us snap out of it after the danger has passed and we return to a surer footing.

The classic Narcissist operates from within this paradigm at every moment of every day. They classify everyone else as either a fellow victim, potential rescuer or persecutor and the addition of the ‘fellow victim’ corner to this triangle makes a very sturdy tetrahedron. A solid pyramid that is both impenetrable and inescapable without concerted effort.

Safety of course would be the ideal ‘cure’ for this malady of the mind for all but the classic Narcissist, but while once removing the lion would be sufficient for that, today the sources are largely inescapable. Combine low self-esteem or self-confidence with the demands (both emotional and physical) of modern life and ‘safety’ as a concept is a scarcity.

Understanding the Victim Triangle dynamic or its studier more enduring application the Persecutors Pyramid is a key to understanding modern human behaviour.

How to assess if someone is stuck in the Pyramid of Persecution:

• If someone categorises everyone ‘else’ as a victim, persecutor or potential rescuer, they are stuck within the pyramid.

• If someone’s interest in other people does not extend beyond their categorisation into one of these categories, they are certainly stuck within the pyramid.
• If an individual’s attitude towards you or anyone else switches instantly as they ascertain that you have moved from ‘fellow victim’ to ‘persecutor’ and then can switch again as quickly if presented with an argument that the individual involved might rather be a ‘potential rescuer’, then they are stuck in the pyramid.
• If individuals pursue ‘potential rescuers’ relentlessly with almost obsessive zeal and then completely lose interest when the individual they are pursuing switches in their mind from ‘potential rescuer’ to ‘persecutor’ (sometimes simply for the crime of refusing to be their rescuer), then they are mired in the triangle.
• Many children of narcissistic parents are conditioned to act from within this paradigm as their own parent tosses them about the triangle — sometimes all in one sitting as they are assigned to ‘persecutor’ then ‘victim’ then ‘potential rescuer’ roles in rapid succession. Many of these children will try to find their way out of the triangle by becoming ‘people pleaser’ and taking up residence in the Rescuer role for anyone who comes along but even this mindset still lives WITHIN and is confined by the Persecutor Pyramid.
• Even if their own healing journey takes them out of the triangle — which requires them making one single decision for which they take 100% responsibility, just one interaction with the Narcissist parent or anyone who mirrors their behaviour will see the child of the narcissist slipping right back into this old conditioning. For them most of all, understanding this dynamic is key to reclaiming a whole healed and empowered life.

What to do if you encounter the Victim Triangle or you identify that someone close to you is mired in the Pyramid of Persecution?

If its you, that is, if you are brave and honest enough to admit to yourself that you really don’t get to know anyone beyond assessing their place in the triangle, then the good news is that with awareness, effort and self-care, you CAN break free of this conditioning by making one, clear conscious choice for yourself that you take 100% responsibility for. Small ones at first, choose your own order at a restaurant and embrace the consequences of enjoying the result, or not. Assign no blame to anyone else and stand in the power of your own choices. Do that enough and the desire to blame others for all the ills of the world will slowly fade and you will begin the journey of understanding the awesome power of your own free will and attention. You will truly take back your personal power and be able to make meaningful and lasting changes in your life by harnessing the awesome power of Free Will (from the power of your attention right through to meaningful action).

On the other hand if its someone else you recognise in all the descriptions above, a friend or perhaps a loved one, there’s only bad news here unfortunately. Thus far, no strategy, counselling modality or actions have shown any success in extracting another from the Pyramid of Persecution. You can refuse the invitation to join them IN the triangle, but even that will likely have you assigned to the ‘Persecutor’ corner. Those INSIDE the triangle simply cannot abide anyone that is NOT assigned to one of the three available roles — it causes a short-circuit in playing out the customary interactions with others and can make them feel disorientated and confused. Because of this they will often push others in all sorts of directions UNTIL they step into one of the three roles and when they finally do this, the one inside the conditioning will demonstrate visible relief. Now they know what to do with you and how to treat you but until you step firmly (in their mind) into one of the three available roles, chaos and uncertainty reigns for them.

You might think it easiest then to step into the Rescuer role (just this once you think, just to get this over with) but there’s no guarantee that you’ll stay there very long if your delivery does not meet up to expectations. Sometimes the easiest thing is to automatically assign yourself to ‘fellow victim’, blaming the ‘powers that be’ and all other nature of ills for the situation, issue or failure, but for anyone not accustomed to complaining and blaming, this might be an uncomfortable journey out of authenticity.

The Pyramid of Persecution is a sad and desolate mindset that is both angry, truly dis empowered and resentful. As the inhabitants take no responsibility for their own actions, behaviour or influence in any given situation, and EVERYTHING is someone else’s fault — from the government to the weatherman — there simply is no personal power to harness to break free of this dynamic. If they ever see it for themselves, THEY can make the choice to break free and might, if they feel safe enough to make the attempt. Until then, you will only ever be a Persecutor, Rescuer or Fellow Victim to them and you will need to embrace that one-dimensional role in order to continue to interact with them peacefully.

As a social ill, the cure can only lie in establishing greater degrees of safety, where children might not be raised by panicking desperate and fearful parents and Narcissism becomes a rarer subconscious life-choice.

Understanding the dynamic empowers you to navigate around it and gives you the insight that those mired within it are truly dis-empowered. Understand that you will never be ‘known’ by one mired in the pyramid and in truth, never truly loved, in any application of the word from platonic to romantic.

Fundamentally this entire paradigm is anchored in and fed by fear. Fear keeps it active, fear grows within it and the self-sabotaging behaviour of those operating from within the Triangle result most often in precisely the results they fear. Fear and love simply cannot exist in the same heart and so you have to know and understand that one mired in the Pyramid of Persecution might venerate you for your Rescuer abilities, might be deeply grateful for your actions as their saviour or they may show token compassion for you in your role as a ‘fellow victim’ — their consistent and amplified levels of fear take any experience of love off the table entirely, in any expression.

The only experience this author has seen in 27 years of Counselling that has had any impact on breaking this conditioning is spiritual in nature but does require the active and enthusiastically willing participation of the ‘Victim’. In this as in many miraculous healings, a Greater Love — of any flavour — can win through, but can never be forced or coerced upon the conditioned.

Now that you know this truth of human behaviour, you will see it everywhere now. You will notice those who blame always, who don’t truly see people beyond the ‘label’ and those who will try to fit you into a corner to know what to do with you. Individually, these is great room for compassion here. Not only is this behaviour usually learnt through pain amidst complete vulnerability but its a debilitating state with no easy exits. Quite literally the belief in their own victim-hood perpetuates that very victim-hood. They don’t choose to be lost in the forest and wont hear you tell them that they are surrounded on all sides by trees.

You will also see clearly through manipulations harnessing this dynamic. Those that assign (usually themselves) to the role of Rescuer of all ‘you poor’ Victims from some seen or implied Persecutor. Or self-proclaimed Fellow-Victims that identify a nebulous Persecutor and advocate for a finite course of Rescue. These efforts all seek to harness the rampant Persecutor Pyramid survival instincts ingrained in each of us to steer us towards desired compliance. The most obvious in recent times is one where those wishing to make informed medical decisions were assigned to the role of Persecutors of the rest of the planet (the Victims and their Fellows) in defiance of the Rescuers (Big Pharma and their puppeteers). All those who harness this surivival instinct to manipulate humanity to their profit and chosen agendas should be identified and exposed.

All we can really offer to the souls caught in this trap is to truly see them, offer some sort of understanding and compassion and perhaps to add to our wish-list for humanity a safer world, where good and valuable survival instincts aren’t turned into weapons to effectively control and subjugate humanity.

That starts with our own personal awareness of this inherently GOOD instinct, gone bad when applied beyond its natural and intended reach and to whatever extent we can, stay out of triangles and pyramids in our relationship with others and our world.

Love. Always. Alyce