Embracing Life

I am more than halfway through this amazing book — “From Strength to Strength” — by Arthur C Brooks. It starts with a quote — “If something cannot go on forever, it will stop.”. The book has made me think even more about myself, my life and the years that are left.

As a person, my decline is certain as I age. But that is something to embrace, and not worry about it. The decline problem has multiple negative implications. Firstly, we need continuous and increasing success to avoid dissatisfaction, but our abilities are declining. Secondly, as we try to maintain our position, we can fall into addictive behaviors like workaholism, which damage our relationships with spouses, children, and friends. Therefore, when we eventually fail, we have no support system to help us recover.

Many of us are in the latter half of our lives, past our mid-40s with a limited number of years remaining. Our cognitive decline has already begun. Working harder won’t solve our problems, and our fulfillment won’t come from work. Our aging brains can’t work as fast as they used to, and younger minds are more adept at what can be done and achieved. We are entering a phase of loneliness if we don’t act intentionally. While we may enjoy solitude and our thinking is deeper than it used to be, loneliness is something to be avoided.

The most effective relationships for reducing loneliness are close friendships and romantic partnerships. The benefits of marriage are significantly increased when spouses consider each other to be their closest friend. This enduring love, which can withstand crises and the passage of time, promotes overall happiness and well-being. Best friends bring out the best in each other, enjoy each other’s company, and find meaning, satisfaction, and joy in their shared experiences.

Strong human connections are essential for thriving in later life, regardless of how introverted you may be. Healthy, intimate relationships are key, and for those who are married, a loving and supportive spousal relationship is crucial. While marriage and family are important, they do not replace close friendships, which require practice, time, and commitment to maintain. It’s important to remember that work friendships are not the same as true friendships, even though they can be fulfilling when intentionally cultivated.

To prioritize relationships, it’s crucial to address workaholism. This involves confronting the reasons for overwork and acknowledging that neglecting relationships will only worsen them. Ultimately, time must be reallocated from work to establishing and nurturing friendships and family life.