The Confession of an Unhandyman

Don’t ask me to fix anything

Villa Flores Dining Room • Photo and paintings by R.C. Flores-Gunkle

August 11: Iban Van der Zeyp asks: What are you currently working on? Can be a DIY or hobby project, reorganizing a room, a work of art… Share a photo and write about it. Peter Mammitzsch also asks, “Have you created something with your own hands? Something you’re really proud of? What is it? If possible, show a photo!” Are you a Do-It-Yourselfer? Are hand and/or power tools your friends? Share your experience making or fixing things. (Rodrigo S-C)

This really is a challenge for me. Actually, it’s several. I have finally caught up on the things that were taking up most of my time this month so I can contribute something here. I have been “retired” for 20 years, and I have been busy doing dozens of things during every one of them.

But I don’t think Iban wants to hear about them; the question is what I am working on now. He might like to know that I have two paintings underway and three blank canvases waiting for my attention. For most of my adult life, I have painted big: 3' x 4’ (so they fit in my car) and sometimes 4' x 6' when someone wants one. I am not a professional artist — I never made my living from my paintings. But I did have a few successful exhibitions and attracted a couple of collectors. And I still love playing with paint.

As for Peter’s related question, I guess my own hands created the paintings, but I think he was looking for something “handier,” like building a birdhouse, a fence, or a garage.

I have never mastered the screwdriver, except when making one with vodka. I have the good fortune of having married a handywoman, so anything that needs the use of a tool, or of assembling, she’s the one. She built the bookcases in my study and laid the floor tiles there. She is currently repairing and rebuilding the walkway up to our house.

I did create a container garden on a terrace, and I supply all our salad and herb needs. I am also the cook. Maybe that counts. I guess you can say we are not a conventional couple.

Rodrigo. Power tools? Forget it. Well, to be honest, I have mastered the reciprocating saw, a battery-powered device. I did it so I could manage the tropical trees and brush that seem to creep into my garden space at night. My wife once tried to get me to use a sensible tool, a machete. But I just could not get the hang of it. (She is a pro.) I call the saw my “gringo machete.” It works for me.

I feel better already. I didn’t let August go by without contributing.

Want to join and accept a challenge?

[embed]August Prompts I’m all out of appropriate adjectivesmedium.com