The One Where We Realize Adulthood is a Scam

and it really is!

When the topic of adulthood comes up, I often to go back to this quote from Friends

Curated from Pinterest

Welcome to the real world! It sucks. You’re gonna love it

• Monica Geller!

It happens right after Rachel decides, somewhat half-heartedly, to stop relying on her father’s credit cards. It wasn’t easy for her. She struggled as a waitress, dropped trays, and got judged for her career choices by her “high-society” friends. The judgement hurt even deeper when it came from someone really close to her. But she did it all. She pushed through everything to eventually land her dream job in fashion.

Isn’t this the blueprint for most of our stories as we step into adulthood?

We are conditioned from childhood to believe in a linear path. We are taught that if we study hard and get the degree, the red carpet will roll out. We believe that after graduation, a job, rather, the dream job will automatically fall into our laps as a reward for our hard work. But the world doesn’t work on a reward system. We are bumped, and flattened when reality hits.

The “Real World” transition consists of a relentless loop: tailoring a perfect resume for each specific role, hitting ‘apply,’ sitting through nerve-wracking interviews, and ultimately getting rejected. Or even worse? Getting ghosted! This specific kind of silence from employer feels louder than a “NO.”

And, as we accept those Silences, the pressure to earn money and build a “life” slowly sets in. You start feeling the unspoken tension around your parents. And, they often restrain themselves from bringing up the elephant in the room: So, what’s next?

Out of necessity, we start taking “petty” jobs just to keep our heads above water. Because, to be honest, middle-class people can’t afford the luxury of waiting for their dream jobs. We take the retail shifts, the data entry roles, or the freelance gigs that have nothing to do with our degrees. We watch our career aspirations feel like they are slipping away, drifting further into the horizon while we’re busy surviving.

Because, Sir Charles Darwin has taught us -

Survival of the fittest!

Yet, there isn’t much peace even landing that corporate role. Anxiety doesn’t vanish. We live in a persistent, low-grade fear of the “layoff” because we’ve realized how replaceable the system makes us feel.

Adulthood, very quickly reveals the Milestone Myth; A realisation that there is no “Expert Level”. Instead, everyone is on their own road of betterment! This creates a strange, quiet anxiety as we wait for a sense of “fully prepared” state that never quite comes. Forcing us to accept that being an adult isn’t about having all the answers, but rather about becoming comfortable with your own growth, on a road chosen entirely by You!

And to that, comes the flip side to Monica’s quote. The

“You’re gonna love it”

This part isn’t sarcasm, well at least not entirely. You start to love the small wins. You love the first paycheck you earned yourself, even if half of it goes to rent. You love the friends who are in the same sinking boat as you, laughing about how broke you are over cheap coffee.

Adulthood is a scam, sure. It’s a series of “assignments” you never asked for and bills you didn’t sign up for. But like Rachel, the struggle is what actually makes the dream job feel like a victory. It may feel all over the place right now, and it might suck for a while. But eventually, you find your feet. You find your people.

And somehow, in the middle of the chaos, one day you’ll realize you’re actually doing it.

Congratulate yourself that day, because, You’re adulting!!