I trust myself, my own true self

I embrace change as life’s only constant.

Photo by Markus Spiske on Unsplash

May 18, 2026

Today is Mout Saint Helen’s Day. May 18, 1980. I remember that time so vividly. I remember it each year, that is how much it impacted me. Not profoundly negatively, not entirely, but it was a shock to experience such an overwhelmingly catastrophic nature event. People died, a quite horrible death. Travel was restricted for a time; cars were damaged by the ash in the air. Ash covered the ground in Eastern Washington.

I compare that event, in my mind, to COVID. It paled in comparison. The length of time we were negatively impacted was miniscule compared to the some two years of COVID. I’ve been through some things in my lifetime.

And now, Trump.

Oh my God. God help us.

I’m self-sabotaging on my weight. It’s all come off so fast, and yet, I’ve so much further to go. There is a fear that strikes deep inside of me. Passing the milestone on the scale I’ve lived over for 12 years, never believing I’d be successful at passing again, has been a monumental change that it’s been difficult for me to wrap my mind around. It’s been difficult to accept this success of mine. And yet, I have been successful.

The days go by, life goes on, and I continue to prevail. My body, my modified body, continues to do its good work for me. And yet, I find myself fighting the process. This battling against my body, a state within which I have lived most of my life, is misplaced. I no longer need to hold onto this weight. It has served me well, in many ways, it truly has. At times, food, and my weight, have allowed me to stay in this world. But now, it’s time to move into a new phase of health and wellness, not just in body, but in mind and spirit. It’s the whole purpose of this battle I’ve waged all my life. I have achieved much of what I set out to achieve, and my transformation continues.

This morning, I wrote out some affirmations for myself. I’ll probably add to them over the next days and weeks. But this is a start.

I trust myself, my own true self, my God-created, God-designed, refined by fire self.

I trust my body, my God-given body, my body that has been modified through the miracle of medicine.

Moment by moment, I commit myself to the process of transformation. I ask the Divine to remove all fear of my body changing and embrace the FACT that these changes are right and good.

I attentively listen to my self-talk, moment by moment; I use affirmative affirming language about myself to my own self.

I acknowledge my fear of change. I hold it up in my hand, look at it, turn it about and examine it from all angles. Then, I speak truth to myself about my transformation.

I embrace change as life’s only constant.

I honor the woman I have become, the woman I am, the woman I am becoming. I honor this woman, moment by moment, every moment, and always.

I Persevere. And life goes on.