Coco Jones Would Rather Be Homeless Than Depend on a Man

Coco Jones Would Rather Be Homeless Than Depend on a Man

Exploring the many woes of financial abuse

Coco Jones would rather be homeless than life off of Donovan Mitchell — Photo created via AI by author

For those who are yet unfamiliar, Coco Jones is a gorgeous, successful singer-songwriter and actress who just so happens to be engaged to one of the NBA's top shooting guards.

However, rather than sitting around and bragging about how she’ll never have to work again, she recently made a statement that is turning some heads:

I’d rather be homeless than depend on a man.

Check out the segment here:

[embed]Coco Jones tells the truth — Source:

Now, to those who have never dealt with callous narcissists, this may sound counterintuitive. I mean, she can clearly get her own money, so what’s so bad about letting her super-rich husband foot the bill?

To be clear, no one is saying Donovan Mitchell isn’t paying his fair share. Rather, that she’s not dependent on it, and will never be.

Why does this matter?

Well, per her past relationships, Coco has learned what many of us more seasoned women have long since figured out: if you give a man power over you, he will abuse it.

And this is even more of an issue when that man is rich and famous. Being in a position where you need these men to survive is the worst thing you can ever do. Not only will he start to resent you and likely use that as an excuse to cheat, but he is also likely to use it to control your every move.

Financial Abuse Exposed

Per the National Network to End Domestic Violence, financial abuse is defined as follows:

Financial abuse is a common tactic used by abusers to gain power and control in a relationship. The forms of financial abuse may be subtle or overt, but in general, include tactics to conceal information, limit the victim’s access to assets, or reduce accessibility to the family finances.

Financial abuse — along with emotional, physical, sexual, and other forms of abuse — includes behaviors that intentionally manipulate, intimidate, and threaten a victim in order to trap that person in the relationship.

In some cases, abusers financially abuse a partner throughout the relationship. In other cases, abusers choose to become financially abusive when the victim or survivor attempts to leave the relationship.

In other words, a partner can use finances to prevent you from leaving them, from bettering your life, from helping others, or even yourself. In reverse, once a man has helped you, he may demand access to your money and monitor every single thing you spend money on, making you afraid to do things that benefit yourself or your loved ones.

In short, it’s akin to having to tiptoe around someone to get your basic needs met. A financial abuser may threaten to leave you and not pay the mortgage, they may refuse to pay your phone bill or car note, leaving you to suffer the consequences, they may monitor the food and other expenses, restricting your diet or access to food, etc.

And no matter how much money they have, living with someone like this can truly be hell.

Power Corrupts

As much as we hate to admit it, power corrupts, and absolute power corrupts absolutely.

Full stop.

Unfortunately, relationships are no exception. When someone has total and complete power over you, they will abuse it.

Per the National Institute of Health, we are all prone to abuse of power, but rich and famous people are even more so.

There is evidence of addiction to the power derived from celebrity and fame. The addictive effect on the powerholder promotes the need to engage in efforts to hold on to and accumulate power. Aging, envy, and fear both conscious and unconscious of retaliation for previous acts may contribute to power’s addictiveness. Efforts to hold on to power perpetually play a key in the practice of nepotism, factional struggle by powerful elites, cronyism, and dynastic succession.

Power abuse disorder has been coined as a neuropsychiatry condition connected to the addictive behavior of the power wielder. Arguments have been made on the relationship between power addiction and dopaminergic alterations. Indeed, changes in the dopaminergic system have been implicated in drug addiction and research on animals suggests that dominance status modulates activity in dopaminergic neural pathways linked with motivation.

Evidence suggests that areas of the brain linked with addiction including the amygdala and dopaminergic neurons play a major in responding to social rank, and hierarchy signals. Multiple lines of evidence from animal studies indicate that dopamine D2/D3 receptor density and availability is higher in the basal ganglia, including the nucleus accumbens, of animals with great social dominance compared to their subordinates. Animal studies suggest that following forced loss of social rank, there is a craving for the privileges of status, leading to depressive-like symptoms which are reversed when social status is reinstated.

In other words, it’s not just having power; it’s the power in relation to others, the threat of losing power, a need to feel important and avenged, etc., that plays a major role in why people become so drunk with dominion that they treat those around them as pawns or children.

And, indeed, even men who don’t have an abundance of money and simply have more than you will often behave the same way. I mean, you might’ve seen the passport bros going to foreign countries and talking about being treated like kings.

These men are the epitome of financial abusers. They believe women who have their own money also have the option to say no, so they go for women with far fewer resources and prospects, so they can get total dominion over the relationship.

To these types, being treated like a king means literally a woman crawling behind him like a peasant, catering to his every whim, with no real free will of their own.

Stay Ready

We all go through things, and as women, and especially moms, you certainly want to be able to depend on your partner from time to time.

However, time to time is not the same as all the time. So, if you do have to depend on a man for any period of time, make sure you have a plan. Set some money aside, find out who would be willing to lend you a few hundred in case you’re in a bind, build up your credit, network with those who may be willing to trade favors, etc.

Because without those things, you will be totally at their mercy. And unfortunately, you never know if someone is capable of driving you crazy until you give them the keys.

Soft Girl Survival Mode

Coco Jones is the epitome of soft girl survival mode. Nobody’s saying you can’t live a soft life, just don’t become putty in anyone’s hands. Make sure you always have your own hustle going and don’t have to go to someone for permission for every little thing.

No matter how good you may have it or how well things may be going, there will always be times when things are not running as smoothly. Those are the times you need to be prepared for, because they can literally make or break you.

So, although some criticized Coco Jones, stating that she’s just pushing the feminist agenda while living the soft life, she’s actually giving real advice based on toxic relationships from her past.

Yes, homelessness is the extreme, but the point is, if your name ain’t on the deed, you’re as good as homeless the next time you fall out anyhow.

Men from all walks of life (and yes, women too) use their finances as leverage to coerce and force their will on others. Sure, you may have the best man in the world who would never do such a thing, but you don’t want to wait until you’re in that position to find out.

Do you think it’s ever OK for a woman to be financially dependent on a man?

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