My Heart Breaks for Women Who Have No Self-Worth

If only I knew what to do for them!

Photo by Sydney Latham on Unsplash

Depression and low self-worth are a thing! It can affect both men and women, but men tend to hide it better.

When you run into someone who is suffering from this malady, what should you say to them? What can you possibly do to make things better and help them take a positive step forward?

Recently, a young woman very close to me made a very scary post on Facebook. I immediately contacted her via Facebook Messenger.

I was horrified by the things she was saying to me, and I even offered to take her to the hospital. She turned me down, but I was still worried. It turns out she is having relationship problems, but her issues are deeper than that.

After being removed from her mother’s home by caseworkers when she was a toddler, she was then passed around to various family members. She was eventually adopted by a distant relative and his partner. There was no stability in her life during her early years, when children learn to bond and depend on their mothers or caregivers.

Things like that affect children for the rest of their lives. She has since developed a hoarding problem. She cannot bear to let go of anything ever owned by a family member.

Meanwhile, she and her partner do not communicate positively. Both she and her partner call each other names and respond to each other in a toxic manner. Relationships are difficult for her, and she clings to ones that don’t work for too long.

I was at a loss as to how to comfort her. I finally begged her to go to counseling with her partner, and they have an appointment next week. I hope it’s helpful.

Some people can help themselves by reading self-help books. I happen to know that this young lady doesn’t like to read. Others can share their issues with a friend. Many simply suffer in silence.

My young lady feels alone. Her family doesn’t live here, and she has not been able to make friends in the two years she’s lived here. I’m at a loss. I do see her often, but there is an ethics conflict, so I cannot counsel her. I tried to make her understand that she is not alone and that I know exactly how she feels, but her pain is too deep to see that now.

I think that most women have some internal issues with self-worth. However, some people have a more depressive personality than others. Sometimes there are things that trigger the lack of self-worth, like being made fun of at school or at home.

My dentist told me he was laughed at as a child when he was asked to read in kindergarten! Obviously, he’s an intelligent man because he became a dentist, but this incident scarred him so deeply that he would no longer read aloud. Then he shared how hard he had worked to overcome his fear of reading the Bible aloud at church. It took time, but he did it. Who would have thought he would harbor such fears?

We all have some self-doubt. Some people seem to be able to work through them, while others get stuck and can’t move forward. I hope my young lady can do this. She’s got a long road, though, and I hope she stays on it.

[embed]Raising low self-esteem Find out why some people have low self-esteem and how it can affect your mental health. Plus, simple tips on how to…www.nhs.uk