Here is a Copy of an Email I Wrote to a Friend

Can You Identify?

My Phone Died Last Night

My sole means of communication is email, currently. My phone died last night. It is about 3.5 years old. I’ve never had that happen before. I don’t keep insurance on products. I’ve always just invested in good cases and that has worked for me. Nothing happened to it…it charges weirdly & won’t power on.

I made an appointment at ubreakifix…but I didn’t show up. I was planning on being home all day for an electrical appointment…but, of course, that got postponed to January because of today’s snow. Goody.

Also…I’ve been wrestling internally with what I’ll call anxiety (for lack of a better term). I just get very hyped / rush-rush. I have to really try to calm myself and sometimes that’s harder than other times. Sleeping is tough. My mind races. I eat very fast…walk very fast…I have to use a lot of self-talk to pay attention. It sucks. I have it all the time, but sometimes it is worse — -when I’m frustrated, generally. (Like when I was working…but other times, too).

I’m frustrated because I want work done inside of the house and my husband has been sick. So, what can I do? It’s stuff I can’t do myself. And, of course, there is the masonry. (George asked about that at tennis on Saturday. It’s like an electric current going through me. I know he has no idea.) And now the electric job. Lalalalalala.

So, I busy myself with projects. (One of them is making food…which I eat a bit too much of and then make a project of giving the rest away). And then I get stressed because my projects aren’t done.

I am really insane. Why do I rush? (My mother used to hurry to get somewhere and then couldn’t wait to leave). The final destination is always death — -and I don’t want that. CRAZY.

So, anyway…I skipped the fixit appointment for the phone. I was up most of the night. I finally slept at about 2:30, kinda. Got up again around 8. Learned the electric work was cancelled. Slept (kinda) on the couch till 11:30. Bought a new phone that is supposed to be delivered by tomorrow night.

Oh, and caffeine probably makes it worse, but not always. That will be the topic of a future column.

You are lucky to have an unencumbered brain.